Please let me design a cell phone

November 8, 2006

An altered phone.I’m willing to buy a $300 phone (retail, of course I’ll get a discount due to whatever contract they suck me into). However, if I’m going to pay $300 for a phone, I want them to spend that $300 on the important things, not a laundry list of unnecessary gidgets and gazmos.

For the cost of adding a shoddy camera, mp3 player, or flip hinge they could make the thing have clearer voice quality, or more durable, or easier to use. But no. Every review I read of phones has things like “Pros: Camera has a flash! Cons: Will shatter if you drop it.” or “Pros: Has great picture messaging, and comes with a memory card the size of a penny! Cons: Reception sucks, and keypad is hard to use.” Wtf people?!

This is the phone I’d pay for:

  • Great voice quality

  • Great reception

  • Simple, easy to use interface

  • Good keypad (must be usable without looking and for texting)

  • Durable (and its child, “feels solid and well made”)

  • Sexy (this is subjective, but basically make it black and iPod-like)

  • Great battery life

  • Bluetooth (that I can use to sync with and get internet to my Mac)

  • Thin

  • Screw the mp3 player (unless it’s so awesome it’ll replace an iPod)

  • Screw the camera (unless it’s so awesome it’ll replace a Canon)

Of course, it doesn’t seem to exist. My wireless carrier definitely doesn’t carry it - maybe I could find an unlocked GSM phone from eBay or something (potentially expensive and scary). More likely, I’ll wait until Wireless Number Portability arrives in Canada (March 14, 2007) and pick from the best of all the phones everyone carries. Or maybe I’ll just keep waiting for the Apple iPhone - maybe they can do it right.

© Allen Pike. See also Twitter and Steamclock.